Fridge and R Von D's 'Bucket List'

In honor of Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman's new movie "The Bucket List," the Fridge and I have had thoughts about our own mortality. The following are our own bucket lists which are a list of things we want to do before we die. Please to be enjoying super-terrific-happy-number-one-lists.

Fridge:

- Go number two on a port-a-potty.

- Get on TV talking on a cell phone at a Red Sox Game.

- Taze a person who calls me "Bro".

- Briefly marry a celebrity whore.

- Go to Vegas and come home broke.

- See Andrew Dice Clay do stand up comedy in person.

- Smoke a cigarette in a bar in Massachusetts.

- Let the CIA waterboard me to see what it feels like.

- Write a full-length movie parody of "Brokeback Mountain" starring myself and R Von D

-Take HGH for one whole month.

-Spend an entire winter watching beisbol in the Dominican Republic.

-Sneak into Tanqueray factory with K-Rock and try to survive the night.

-Be physically removed from an all-you-can-eat buffet.

- Fall though the Spanish announce table during a wrestling match.

-Sit in the bleachers of Yankee Stadium with a Red Sox hat when the Yankees aren't playing the Red Sox.

R Von D:

- Spank a young nurse's ass while I'm in a nursing home.

- Eat an entire Carvel cake by myself.

- See an elderly couple holding hands on a beautiful spring day and tell them to "Get a fucking room."

- An Asian.

- Go on a 48 hour bender and still make it to work on time on Monday morning.

- Out drink K-Rock.

- Run up a tree or wall and do a backflip.

- Ruin a wedding.

- Win a karaoke contest.

- Have a nickname synonymous with a city or state ie.- "Memphis" or "Motor City."

- Move to Waltham.

- Pin my dad.

- Pee on a national monument.

- Convince a random woman that I am either a major league baseball scout or a minor league baseball player.

- Kill an animal with my bare hands.

- Date a stripper.

- Drink a Colt .45 out of Lord Stanley's Cup.

- Get something comped from a casino.

Addendum (I think that word makes sense here, correct if wrong Rob Van Dam)
by K-Rock

-Fix My Slice

-Tour Canadian Hunter Distillery

-Kick Tim Donaghy in nuts

-Replace Domn8r at top of Bad Dawgs list

-Literally stump the Schwab

-Blackout at a Bowling Alley

-Pet a dog without fearing for my life

-Take a pilgrimage to 1915 Moonlight Road Surry County, Virginia

-Be a high school Latin teacher